雅思写作从5到7的技巧?


当外语学习者进入备考雅思写作这个阶段,实际上最缺的不是词汇(阅读另讲),而是怎样合理使用,组合,连接自己现有的词,然后组成一篇自信的雅思学术短文。同样的家常菜材料,为什么有的人就炒得那么好吃呢?一个道理。
5~6分
我看过很多5.5分的作文,大词连篇,模版生搬硬套(如moreover不是递进关系,是谈论另一个方面)似乎写一个词就意淫着考官的瞠目结舌,wow!同学厉害!这样的景象。实际上,抛开夸张的词组,花哨的连接,这些同学的语法,都有或多或少的问题。这就是为什么他们考了多次还是卡在5.5分的原因。只有通过学习语法,认清楚每个词在句子的角色,合理安排。(如1.不是每个名词都能跟同位语从句,一般是较抽象的词才行。2.due to后面不能直接接完整的句子。)当你能够分析出每个单词在句子的正确成分,语法也算基本过关,注意写完检查即可)保证了这个和基本的逻辑,也就保证了6分。
6~7分(重点)
在较少的语法错误的情况下,做到以下四点即有可能冲击7分。1.句子的之间的连贯性。2.论述的逻辑性,非跳跃性思维。3.四五组高水平高准确度的词组(collocation)。 4.全方位扣题(fully address)
1.连贯,凝聚。
文章之所以不同于单个的句子,就是因为其整体上是连贯的,而这种连贯达到后,阅读者会感到很顺畅(flow),这也是雅思写作的四大要求之一。从以下四个方面可以提升你写作的连贯性。

(1).明连接。通过正确使用however,moreover,another reason is that等词来达到文章表面的连接。

(2).光有表面的连接是不够的,文字内在的连接也是很重要的。正确地使用代词。在指带明确的情况下,上一句子从出现了people,下一句话可以出现they,these people,甚至直接换词individuals。上个句子出现了一种现象,如人们工作太长时间(people work extremely long hours),这个现象在下一句中即可用this/it代替,如 People who live in big cities have to work long and unsocial hours due to the increasingly stiff competition,and this can give rise to their mental health problems 另外,值得注意的是,高水平雅思作文以及考官都很喜欢使用such这个词。这个词也能高强度连接两个句子。

(3).关键词的重复和推敲。一段话中,几个句子中各自的关键词的呼应,也能起到提升整体连贯性的作用。如,文章问教育问题,文章可能会出现的higher education,education equality等词,也能起来一种逻辑上和读感上的连接性。
2.论述的逻辑
这点既是提升文章流畅度的第四点,也是独立的重要得分点。

为了最优最快达到这点,在这里我推荐顾家北老师的ABC方法。

A是一件事件,一个动作(action) B是事情的结果(result) C是这个结果所造成的结果(end result)

(1).当题目提出了一个事件,问这件事情的影响?就是确定了A

(2).当题目提问:什么造成了一个结果(此结果已被题目论述),那就是确定了C

举个例子:
题目:Some people believe that only students with best academic results should be rewarded while other people believe it is more important to reward students with improvements.Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
这个题目就是确定了A (双边)

边1的A——最好的学生被奖励(已被确定) 因此需要写B和C。 B——这些学生(high achievers)因此受到鼓励和支持,保持学术优异 C——他们全面开发了自己的天赋和智力,为社会做出更多的贡献(这个ABC想得不太好,但是雅思主要考察语言能力,大家看看就好)
边2的A——不管是否是最好的学生,有进步的学生就该被奖励(已被while other people后面的论述确定) B——努力的学生得到精神和物质支持,开始建立自信并开始进步 C——差生们(low performers)认识到进步比名次重要,也开始开发自己的潜力(achieve academic potential)
ABC中需要有各种各样的拓展方式(举生活例子,讲背景,特定化),大家可以去试试顾家北的课。(PS无广告费)
3.词组
良好的词组搭配,1.能够节省大量的时间(常常两三个词就能说清楚低水平英语学习者需要一句话的事情),2.能够提升文章的整体质量,真正做到惊艳考官,而不是用各种高频词以外,自己都不怎么会的词来烦考官。3.当词组的数量积累到一定数量,口语里也可以自然使用,这也是一种不错的突破口语的方式。

下面我列举一些我最近收集并使用的词组。注意:词组大多数都不包含大词,全是简单词组成,但是却有大能量。看很多考官范文,其中不少基本不出现难词,用的全是简单词,三两词合起来却颇有四两拨千斤的意味。
1.energy-starved. eg. India is perennially energy-starved.
2.embrace renewable energy. eg.Another big area where India can advance more quickly than the rest of the world is in embracing renewable energy.
3.lack of access/basic human needs/more of a first order problem/draw attention/lion's share
eg.Poverty and general lack of access to basic human needs is more of a first order problem,and one that draws lion's share of attention from government,business and people.
4.over-consumption. eg.Over-consumption of natural resources may give rise to environmental issues.
5.place a high value on sth. eg.The government used to place a high value on the big initiatives to promote better healthcare.
6.work long hours. eg.A decent life can be earned,if people work long hours.
7.cast a shadow on sth eg.The accident cast a long shadow on the safety of the metro system.
8.put strain on sth. eg.The rapidly rising health problems among the vulnerable groups due to the poor air quality has put strain on the national healthcare system.
积累雅思词组的方式有很多。
(1).阅读BBC除新闻的各个板块,或者guardian的各个讲环境,污染,生活,健康的板块。

第一遍训练阅读能力,达到整体理解,基础差点的可以把看不懂的句子一步步用语法分解(break down),找到主谓宾等结构。第二遍找到可以学习的词组,自己记下来,并自己造句(这点很重要)。PS:学英语几年最讨厌的就是看新闻,以前常逼自己看,实则很累....收获小于痛苦。
(2).购买小姨的十天,里面有很多不错的好词。关注顾家北的微信,他每天会推送各种各样的材料,把词组点亮,并附有解析,非常有帮助。学习simon的官网,百度搜simon ielts里面也有很多好用的词汇,上次学到一个the graying of the population(老龄化)
4.任务的完成度(task response)
(1).扣题。这是最好拿分的一项,尤其对那些基础不太好的学生。其考察的不是语言能力,而是一种答题思路。题目问什么,就好好的答什么,别因为想到词或词组,非要用出来吓考官,结果扯到天上去。注意:记得用各种例子和手法提供论点的支撑。

(2).结构。 结构不等同于模板,只需要用最常用的结构答题即可。

论述和观点类
开头段(简单介绍下背景【hook】 引出双方论点,讲出自己观点)
论述段(2-3段即可)(body part)先写中心句。然后拓展下,然后举例子,不够字数可以用without sth(sth是段落叙述的那个核心),sth bad will happen
结尾(总结下观点的重点,However之类的词引出自己论述的观点核心。结束)
问题和解决方案类
根本跟上面两类一致,中心段 一段写这个事件带来的问题(注:题目也有可能问是什么造成了这个问题)
一段写怎么解决。
5.小tip:
由于雅思考察的是学术英语,要求的写作风格自然也是formal writing,所以不能出现don't can't这种写法。don't改写为do not. can't改写需要合一起,也就是cannot.
最后附一篇前几天自己写的,大概有6.5-7分酱紫。
Online courses have become a vital part of modern education,since a growing number of students accept this new way of acquiring skills and knowledge.However,the long-term effectiveness of it remains disputable.
Supporters of distance-learning programs argue that learners may not only spend less money on education,but also receive better teaching quality.Most learners are under 20 years old and have not joined the workforce yet,so they have limited budget or are largely dependent on their parents.Online courses,which are much cheaper than traditional ones,can save them a considerable amount of money which can be invested in other equally important areas like health maintenance or entertainment.Another reason is that learners can easily meet world-class teachers on the Internet.Traditionally,teachers,regardless of their levels of teaching skills,can only have no more than 100 students in a class.Such number,however,can rise three-fold to 300 if taught online.Best teachers or tutors,whose VIP courses tend to cost 500 yuan per hour,thus are motivated to provide courses online and cut tuition fees as a result of larger numbers of students attending their class.This can be rather beneficial for students who are internally motivated and eager to gain more knowledge.
Others may cite that,in some cases,students who need direct supervision and lack motivation may waste their time and money if taught online.Self-motivation is in short supply among many students in China,because they get used to complete courses and assignments under teachers' strict supervision after being exposed to Chinese education for years.If they pay for distant-learning services,they may experience difficulty in concentrating on class and finishing daily home work,therefore not only wasting money but also failing to benefit from these courses.Besides,it is almost impossible for online teachers to separate students in groups to do team work,which plays an important role in promoting students' problem-solving and critical thinking ability.
In conclusion,I'm of the opinion that students who are externally motivated should attend traditional class and have direct contact with their teachers,whereas those who can do self-study and focus on class are supposed to choose distance-learning programmes due to less fees and better quality of instruction.



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